I certainly have been in more pain in my life than not...At 19, I was in my first car accident, where a 100 pound chest landed on top of me. I was in a van, it slid on ice, it went end-over-end and my spine was bent and triggered muscle spasms constantly. At 21, I was diagnosed with spondylitis arthritis. I had a severe amount of joint pain in my hands wrists and shoulders. At 24 I was in my second car accident, I was rear ended and got a severe whiplash and found out I have a vertebrae fusion in my cervical spine and had many a migraine (3 a month for years and years). My third car accident is where my back hit the front dashboard and I had a lot of pain in my lower back after that. I then got carpal tunnel so severely that I couldn't lift a coffee cup I would wake up in the middle of the night screaming in pain in my shoulders. I then got chronic fatigue with fibromialgia symptoms. My forth, last and worst car accident was about 14 years ago where I tore my Q.L. muscle. I also had many other micro fiber tears in my neck shoulder and my pelvis has never been the same as hit it on the side of the car. I was on disability for a year and went to physical therapy for a year.
When I was young I had pelvic inflammatory disease where I develop a lot of scar tissue all in around my abdominal region including wrapped around my bowels. I had a tubal pregnancy where my left tube burst, they had to take it out and that resulted in more scar tissue. When I had my son 16 years ago I had a c-section and I was getting up from the floor 2 days after the c -section I tore on the inside. And 5 years ago they removed my uterus full of fibroid tumors equal to the size of a small watermelon. No wonder I had all that pain during my periods. In 2015 a MRI showed I have arthritis in my lower back and two bulging disks but I have no symptoms! It's been about 3 years now where I haven't had any pain. Well looking at it it's been more like 30 years of pain I've been in more pain in my life than not.
I developed a very, very slow moving meditation to allow my body to heal. And I am so very grateful for not having pain now! Through a lot of listening to my body and only taking the pain pills if the pain was so bad I couldn't breath. (When you take pain meds you lose the bodies own ability to combat the pain. For me it was important to "feel".) Then through the slowest movement you can imagine with deepening the breath, over time, the pain started getting better. I now am pain free without medication, very strong, very flexible and most importantly very happy.
I continue to this day to perfect this "moving meditation" combining VinniYoga, Hanna Somatics and Pilates creating sequencing reclining on the floor. Most all of the movements are done where the student is reclining on the floor as to decompress the spine and where the intermittent "letting go" is supported and nurtured in very passive posses. Also "feeling" regardless if the student is moving or letting go is encouraged. The more we feel the more we can heal. This practis is not to be confused with restorative yoga although from time to time we can and do use restorative poses to "let go". I continue to heal and teach this method to my students, I call it Gentle Bliss (Back Care) and for a little more "work" where we get up off the floor; Gentle Core (Back Care). I have been practicing yoga and many other modalities for over 30 years and my classes are unlike any Yoga or movement classes I know or have ever seen.
In our day to day we can subconsciously get caught up in holding patterns in the body, we don't have to be in intense pain for this to happen. We can be mentally stressed carrying this "holding" in our body even when we sleep. I have learned how to let go. When we let go of our mental anguish the body softens and vice versa when we relax the body we release the "monkey mind". When we are in pain that "monkey mind" can be referenced to a pain/tension loop that is extremely hard to get out of. So my pain was not in vain, I get to help others through what I learned from being in pain. Although I have had many great Yoga teachers my best teacher has been my pain and for that I am very grateful, yes, even for the pain. Remember what you resist persists!
I welcome any and all questions please call or text 530.559.0806 Or email me at [email protected]
